There’s a reason why things are often so hard.
Sometimes, it doesn’t seem fair what you have to contend with. You look around and see other people living glamorous “amazing” lives, and wonder what you did wrong in a previous life to have to suffer and struggle so much.
You work your ass off, sacrifice yourself, and try to do all the shit that you see on those “19 Things That Wealthy, Beautiful, Happy People Better Than You Do” lists on Facebook. You get sucked into watching 4 hours straight of Youtube videos, being told what you’re missing and how easy success and happiness are once you have the secret process or five step solution.
Yet you feel a constant internal disappointment that you’re just not doing enough, like you’re standing on the outside, looking in.
How is it so easy and natural for others to be happy, successful, wealthy .. and yet you can’t seem to get it together?
Here’s the truth: It’s because life is fucking hard, and it’s hard for everyone.
The problem is that in today’s bullshit social media world, it only appears that other people are skating through life, and shit just happens for them. Money drops in their lap, their kids are perfect, every photo they post has them laughing and drinking at those places you wish you could get into, assuming you could actually afford them.
You know that dude who posted on yesterday about his new Lambo? His updates don’t mention that his daughter went into intensive care today from an overdose of fentanyl. She got into the wrong crowd who doesn’t give a shit about her, because she felt alone in the world. And our Lambo driver blames himself for it.
That girl with the crazy body and amazing hair who is always posting the perfect selfies? Right. Her Dad just received a terminal diagnosis for pancreatic cancer, and she now drinks to black out to soothe the fear and pain she has about the thought of losing her Dad.
Then there’s that guy who just sold another company, who you’re pretty sure is on the same beach in his profile pic that they shot the Corona commercials in? Yeah, his wife just left him. He was were never home, took her for granted, and didn’t provide any sense of connection or love to whom is supposed to be the most important person in his life.
You don’t see these images or stories much on Facebook and Instagram. We’ve all got a reputation to uphold, and who wants to be a Debbie Downer anyway?
If you’re having a tough time, or dealing with some life shattering news .. maybe you’ve lost someone close to you, or you don’t know how you’re going to make it into next month and get the bills paid ..
.. know that you are truly not alone.
Life is hard for EVERYONE. The purpose of life is not to avoid suffering. Suffering is something every human being contends with. In fact, I believe the act of suffering is something crucial and important to living a great life.
What makes life worth living is choosing what suffering you will endure, not avoiding it.
Stop measuring how successful you are in your adulting efforts by whether or not you’re struggling, or having issues and problems.
The dream of “finally not having problems” is just that – a dream that never comes. Because it’s impossible.
Don’t judge your progress by whether or not you have problems – everyone has them. Judge your progress by whether you’re dealing with the same problems you faced last year.
Successful people who are growing, learning, progressing? They face new, bigger problems with every step ahead. They solve the ones they have, making room for bigger obstacles to climb.
And they don’t get down on themselves when it seems like they continually face problems. They recognize that it’s simply a part of life that everyone gets to deal with – it’s only matter of perspective.
The day you stop having problems is not a day you ever want to come — because the only time you’ll stop facing problems is when you die.
So accept your problems. Embrace them. Grab them by the throat, one by one. Smile. And scream, “You’re MINE, bitch!”
And wrestle that problem down to the ground, punch it in the face, and strangle the life out of it. Know that you’re taking one more step towards bigger problems that will take you to newer heights.